Cave Initiation

In the previous post, “Kripalu Retreat,” I detailed a few trance experiences that helped shape my practice by introducing a significant figure, the man in the white robe. Jung would certainly describe him as the Sage archetype, which he certainly is. If he was ever at one point “real,” and by that I mean human, is unknown. More will be revealed about him as I write this blog. In this post, I detail my first encounter with another powerful entity by the name of Gwynn ap Nudd. Those of you who are well-versed in Welsh mythology or listen to Jo Hickey-Hall’s podcast, “The Modern Fairy Sightings Podcast,” will be familiar with him.

At the time of this experience, I was reading “By Oak, Ash, & Thorn: Modern Celtic Shamanism,” by D.J. Conway, and decided that I would give the “Cave Initiation” (page 76) a try from the comfort of my bedroom. Conway’s works (died Feb. 1, 2019) receive a lot of criticism for not being entirely historically accurate. Those critiques are valid, though I must agree that a resource does not always need to be historically precise for it to be meaningful. Heck, all of Wicca is built on a false notion of an unbroken witchcraft tradition, and thousands of people find that their magic works. Margaret Murray’s “research” and thesis, though untrue, still sparked the imagination and laid the groundwork for a modern-day witchcraft revival.

In this “Cave Initiation,” Conway gives a framework for a guided meditation that is meant to introduce the reader to an “elf, faerie, or one of the Celtic deities” who “asks why you wish to become a shaman.” You can already see the historical incongruities here (the word “shaman” would not have been known or used in Celtic societies). Nevertheless, what she is instructing is a valid approach to entering daimonic reality and meeting with a daimon. I know this not because of historical documents, but because it worked.

The cave is as archetypal an image as my white robed man, the Sage. Plato believed it represented ignorance, while Jung thought of it as the realm of the Unconscious. In Celtic traditions, caves were portals to the Otherworld or even the domain of supernatural beings. If you don’t have access to a cave, homemade is fine! Create a blanket and pillow fort or set up a tent. The important part here is to limit the amount of light that gets through. I suppose you could wear an eye mask, but where is the fun in that?

Lastly, you’ll want to either have a friend drum for you or listen to an audio recording. In this post, I won’t lay out the exact meditation. I am only describing to you what my experience was like. In the future, I will post on how to make contact with your Familiar (personal daimon) and will provide step-by-step instructions. Below is the detailed account.

“I opened my eyes, and to my right, I could see before me a low mountain range in the distance. In front of me was a vast plain, as far as I could see. There were short trees and small winding creeks. I walked onto the tall grass of the plain and heard the buzzing of insects and chirping of birds. I turned toward the left and walked down a hill. As I walked, the smell of moss and river water overtook my senses. The path led to a forested valley. I was naked, but did not appear like my physical self. I was older and covered in ornate spiraling tattoos. The markings covered my bald head, trailed down my neck, and covered the entirety of my back. I came upon a great mound with an entrance made of three stones. There were two slabs on the side and one across the top. On the top slab was a symbol carved into it. It was covered in dirt and moss. I removed the moss and saw three dots in a triangular formation. Lines appeared to connect them into the shape of a spiral with a circle in the center (pictured below). I entered the mound. It was dark except for a pale outline of what I thought was a blanket. I got closer and saw that it was the hide of a white bull. The hide was damp but warm. Freshly skinned? What happened next can only be described as being within a dream within a dream; I was pulled deeper into trance and awoke facing a tall, pale humanoid being. He was very fair-skinned, thin, with long dark hair, pale blue eyes, and elongated ears. I noticed that his ears were shredded in parts, like how a street cat’s ear might look. His eyes were further apart than a human’s, and his brow and nose bridge were wider, too. I asked him what he was. He responded, “The faery of the mound.” It was then that I noticed a much smaller figure poke out from behind him. This being, or creature, was genderless from what I could tell and was much uglier than the tall one. It had straggly grey hair, wandering lazy eyes, a slight hunch in its back, and skin covered in dirt. The tall one placed a large snake skin on my chest. The small one took it and wrapped it around my feet, legs, belly, chest, and up to my neck. I did not feel afraid despite being very much fearful of snakes in “real life.” The tall one then dumped many small snakes on top of me. What I saw next was like watching a time-lapse video of the lifecycle of a snake; they grew, molted, died, decomposed, and started all over again. Crow was with me the entire time. He grabbed a few of the small snakes and ate them, perhaps wanting to be a part of the action? The small being shook his head and left for a moment. It soon returned to me with a bowl of liquid. The tall one lifted my head while the small one put the bowl to my mouth. The liquid moved like smoke and was warm. I felt soothed. When I finished drinking, the tall one placed his index and middle finger to my forehead, between my eyes. I saw a vision of my older self. I was cloaked in a black feathered hooded cape. I wore a bird mask and held a staff. I was standing at an unknown forest’s edge. A murmuring dark mass flew all around me. It felt menacing, but I was not afraid. I reached into the darkness and grabbed at a screaming face. The face attempted to bite at my hand, but I held firm, and it could not escape. The longer I held on, the louder its screams became. Using my staff, I knocked the tip of it against the face, and it turned to ash. I then sat upright and was given some time to speak to the two beings. I asked if I would be seeing more of them. They nodded. I then asked for its name. The taller one responded. “Gwynn.”